Many people that go through divorce have long-ago reconciled themselves to the fact that the divorce is going to happen. They have prepared for it and are ready to move through it and on from it.
But many people struggle with the emotions of the divorce, and the ultimate sense of loss that follows. It is truly one of the most traumatic events in a person's life (listed as the #2 stresser for a person on the Holmes Rahe Stress Scale, followed at #3 by marital separation).
So why do we not reach out to someone that is going through a divorce the same way we reach out to someone that has had a death in the family? Or someone that is suffering through an illness? I would guess that most people just don't know what to say or do.