Balance of Light and Dark

Balance of Light and Dark

We’ve crossed that threshold: autumn. It still feels like summer here in Arkansas, but the balance of light and dark tipped over into darkness with the autumnal equinox. We can look forward to football and scarves; we can embrace the descending leaves and smell cinnamon and cloves everywhere. And pumpkin spice. Light some candles and drink some cider, because winter is coming.

Why am I brooding about fall? I admit it: I’m being a bit dramatic; but there are a few things I’d like to address in this post.  First, this is the time to think about Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas if you have kids and you are divorced. Consult your divorce decree and then have a discussion with your ex. It’s always good to clarify about the holidays because misunderstandings and miscommunication happen frequently in normal family circumstances and, if anything, good communication needs to increase after a divorce where the children are concerned. Make sure you both understand the other’s plans for the holidays. Make sure you are both satisfied with the balance of holiday visitation. Resentment is a breeding ground for further conflict.

The second issue I’d like to bring forward is a little more ambiguous and a good deal darker. Check in on your marriage if you have been having issues. It’s no secret that a spouse often files for divorce after the turn of the year. Many partners want to wait and see how the holidays go or are waiting for the holidays to end before they make such a huge decision. I’m not saying a marriage can’t be saved after January 1st, but knowing now that sometimes the winter brings about a change in some marital circumstances could prompt the talk or counseling session that just might put you on a new path.  Winter brings death, but it also makes way for spring and new life.

There’s your legal balance of light and dark. Now, go have a fall themed latte– because I sure won’t.